Without Ceasing

Last night, early morning today, we held an event on campus called Without Ceasing. Similar to Encounter tour senior devotions worship, and something that took my heart back to the first time I interacted with Encounter worship. The peace, the joy, the love and the hope that came from worshiping with people who are just as broken and hurt as I am, gave me a peace.
I wasn't really sure what it was, or if I was just putting this idea of peace in my head. I was shut off, crying, and distant from anyone and anything. Yeah, there were people around, but never close enough for me to explain what was really going on....
I began to think of my life. Really, who am I? Do I really live this life the way that I should? Do I let my past define who I am today? And will I always have a tag line to my name that I have been so messed up that I will never get away from that?
I knew that Alexz and Jennifer were there, but I still felt all alone. Like no one will fully understand, and be fully willing to deal with all that I am...
I am still working through all of those questions and still trying to find a hope that will give me the real peace and acceptance.
I don't know where I am supposed to go with all of this, or where I am supposed to place all of it, except at the foot of the cross, and leave it there...